j . a . m . k . m . b: Happy Birthday Big D!

Pres. Thomas S. Monson, Oct 2008

"This is our one and only chance at mortal life—here and now. The longer we live, the greater is our realization that it is brief. Opportunities come, and then they are gone. I believe that among the greatest lessons we are to learn in this short sojourn upon the earth are lessons that help us distinguish between what is important and what is not. I plead with you not to let those most important things pass you by as you plan for that illusive and non-existent future when you will have time to do all that you want to do. Instead, find joy in the journey—now.

... Professor Harold Hill, one of the principal characters in [The Music Man], voices a caution that I share with you. Says he, “You pile up enough tomorrows, and you’ll find you’ve collected a lot of empty yesterdays.”

f you have children who are grown and gone, in all likelihood you have occasionally felt pangs of loss and the recognition that you didn’t appreciate that time of life as much as you should have. Of course, there is no going back, but only forward. Rather than dwelling on the past, we should make the most of today, of the here and now, doing all we can to provide pleasant memories for the future.

Stresses in our lives come regardless of our circumstances. We must deal with them the best we can. But we should not let them get in the way of what is most important—and what is most important almost always involves the people around us. Often we assume that they must know how much we love them. But we should never assume; we should let them know. Wrote William Shakespeare, “They do not love that do not show their love.”³ We will never regret the kind words spoken or the affection shown. Rather, our regrets will come if such things are omitted from our relationships with those who mean the most to us.

Send that note to the friend you’ve been neglecting; give your child a hug; give your parents a hug; say “I love you” more; always express your thanks. Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved. Friends move away, children grow up, loved ones pass on. It’s so easy to take others for granted, until that day when they’re gone from our lives and we are left with feelings of “what if” and “if only.” Said author Harriet Beecher Stowe, “The bitterest tears shed over graves are for words left unsaid and deeds left undone.”

In the 1960s, during the Vietnam War, Church member Jay Hess, an airman, was shot down over North Vietnam. For two years his family had no idea whether he was dead or alive. His captors in Hanoi eventually allowed him to write home but limited his message to less than 25 words. What would you and I say to our families if we were in the same situation—not having seen them for over two years and not knowing if we would ever see them again? Wanting to provide something his family could recognize as having come from him and also wanting to give them valuable counsel, Brother Hess wrote—and I quote: “These things are important: temple marriage, mission, college. Press on, set goals, write history, take pictures twice a year.”

Said one well-known author: “Both abundance and lack [of abundance] exist simultaneously in our lives, as parallel realities. It is always our conscious choice which secret garden we will tend . . . when we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that’s present—love, health, family, friends, work, the joys of nature, and personal pursuits that bring us [happiness]—the wasteland of illusion falls away and we experience heaven on earth.”

Said the Lord in a revelation given through the Prophet Joseph Smith, “In nothing doth man offend God, or against none is his wrath kindled, save those who confess not his hand in all things.”¹⁰ May we be found among those who give our thanks to our Heavenly Father. If ingratitude be numbered among the serious sins, then gratitude takes its place among the noblest of virtues.

Brothers and sisters, my sincere prayer is that we may adapt to the changes in our lives, that we may realize what is most important, that we may express our gratitude always and thus find joy in the journey."

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Happy Birthday Big D!

Dave turns 32 today. While it is very uncommon for me to remember my siblings' ages, I actually remember Dave's because he was a Bicentennial baby born in 1976. Amazing what actually sticks in this swiss-cheese brain of mine.

I have a lot of great memories of Dave over the years. I'm going to ramble for a while and just share some memories with you in no particular order.

-Dave sitting in the way back of the family suburban, hands clutching the back of the middle seat, bouncing vigorously up and down as we drove home up the Avenues, trying not to pee his pants
-Dave playing basketball with me in the back yard - I remember very well the one time he won when he was much smaller than I was...he launched a beautiful rainbow jumper from the side of the old backyard court, I watched it go through the hoop for the win, but he was already running for his life before it even went through, which was the appropriate reaction because I took off after him...
-playing couch football in the downstairs playroom with Dave
-riding bikes to Northcrest with Dave and Spencer
-Dave as captain and emotional leader of the West High basketball team
-Dave fasting the day he went through the temple, and then having him throw up in a certain part of the temple, after which I had to then occupy the same spot... yuck
-Dave leaving for his mission to North Carolina; seeing him off at the airport and he was sick and even skinnier than usual - he'd been sick for at least a week - MTC food ...
-Dave coming back from his mission a confident and mature man
-Dave's guitar playing and singing
-Dave's homecoming - every time I hear the hymn Nearer My God To Thee I think of him singing it over the pulpit and me feeling the spirit so strong I couldn't stop the tears.
-long rides in all kinds of weather with Dave (sometimes far behind Dave) as he got me into biking
-and many more....

I love Dave so much. I've always felt protective of him (except for the one time mentioned above when I tried to kill him), and that's not because he needed it, just because I care for him. He's a great brother and man.

Happy birthday Dave.

2 comments:

Dave said...: Thanks, J. Your words really felt beautiful. I know that sounds weird, but that's how I measure things these days since I haven't always had the opportunity: how does it feel to me. Love you too and thanks for letting me win that one game (funny, I don't remember it so you either beat me hard enough that I don't remember it, or you're telling a fib to make me feel better).; April 30, 2008 at 8:00 PM
jamkmb said...: No fibs. I can still picture you taking off at a dead sprint as the ball was going through the net. You did get a victorious yell in though as you tore down the brick path. I don't think I beat you senseless because you found mom, so the sheer terror must have been enough to block it out of your mind.; May 1, 2008 at 3:27 PM

j . a . m . k . m . b

Pres. Thomas S. Monson, Oct 2008

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Happy Birthday Big D!

2 comments:

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